Sick of 24 Hour Fitness

Thanks to my bestie Jessie Cordell Chisleiehnslbm (I don't know how to spell your new last name) who informed me that she actually reads my blog. Since no one was leaving comments, I thought no one was reading and I was about to throw in the towel to my horribly depressing life.

Today I finally joined the gym. The 24 Hour Fitness. I worked out and only made it 1/2 mile on the elliptical before my lungs were burning so bad that I had to work it off on the treadmill. I was surrounded by gym junkies and high schoolers who were all trying to make eye contact with me. What they didn't know is that I'm extremely serious about going to the gym, that and I will not date someone who is obsessed with the gym. Been there, done that, no fun. Nor will I date anyone I met at the gym, because how lame would that story be if your parents met at the gym?! Anyways, I was biking and thinking, I could bike 3 miles no problem, and then I started to feel really, really nauseous. I thought, I'll just push through it, but for some reason Katie Cullen's voice came into my head telling me to take it easy my first time back. The Spirit, hallucination, or bestie telepathy? I don't know. I had to stretch it out for a good ten minutes before I felt well enough to walk to the car.

Why did I join the gym you may ask? Well, I was getting into the shower the other day, and I caught a glimpse of the horribleness that is my body. I seriously almost started crying. I look like I just a baby. The sad thing, is that I look like I just had a baby, but I didn't/don't get to experience the good things about having a baby.

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas. Mine was very low key, which was nice. My little sisters and I went to South-center mall to go shopping. As we were leaving, a news story came on the TV that told us that there was a shooting in the South-center parking lot yesterday. I love Seattle.

This is our Santa picture this year. My second oldest brother Tate refused to be in the picture because "I'm 27 and I can do what I want", so it's just his wife with us. My oldest brother Broc and his ex(actually we aren't sure if it's ex) moved back to Arizona, so it's just 5 at home now.


This picture took me 25 minutes to get it upright. I almost killed my dad over it.

My dad is currently lecturing me on how I shouldn't have a blog because it could offend people. Because you write about people. I said "I don't care" and he said "Well that's sad that you don't care" and continued to talk about offending people because of what I say. So, I'm sorry if I have offended anyone.

All I Want for Christmas...

So as I sat on a Saturday night completely alone (literally, I'm the only one in my house right now), I thought to myself, I'll update my blog. Wow, the joys of my life I tell you. Tonight I watched Kill Bill 1 and 2, by myself, because I knew that one of the characters spoke Cantonese.

So I'm trying not to be so Grinchy. I've turned up the Christmas tunes, gone to the temple, and thought about/told my mom what I want for Christmas. This year's Christmas list is pretty basic, but seriously needed.

1. A visit from Aunt Flo. She hasn't visited in over 10 months.
2. A new journal.
3. A new bra(s).
4. Some mints (I don't like chewing gum).
5. A job in Utah.
6. Lotion.
7. Some friends that can speak Cantonese (or friends in general at this point).
8. Health insurance.
9. Car insurance.
10. To pay off my parent's mortgage.

I love the holiday season, even though I pretend to be Jewish at work so people feel really bad when they talk about Christmas. My dad and I (more my dad because he's a control freak) have started reupholstering our couch. I think I already mentioned that. I've also been practicing my favorite Chinese piano song. It gives me goosebumps. I used to make the kids in Hong Kong play it for me all the time. I think if I have about 10 years more practice, I could play is like this:

Data Entry Isn't For Me

I started another job, and I'm contracted to work there for about 2 weeks. It's a company that markets an educational, interactive systems for a fun interactive new-age learning. Yes, it is as boring as it sounds. For eight hours everyday, I search the internet for school district administrator's and principal's information to input into their CRM (fancy acronym for database). I hate the internet and computers now. I honestly feel like my soul is being sucked away into my computer.

Highlights from this week:

-Thinking I was 10 minutes early on my first day of work, only to realize that I was 20 minutes late. And then late my second day because of traffic.
-Walking to the bus stop 10 blocks away through the worst rain I've ever seen in Seattle.
-Working in a cubicle even though I promised myself I would never work in a cubicle unless Gary Coleman was working there too.
-A lady falling asleep ON me on the bus. Her excuse? "I work 9 hours everyday". Try 16 lady (another great lesson in not complaining about your situation).
-I figured out why weirdos like me, because they are "safe" so I can be myself. It's the same with married men.
-Being allergic to something in the office and every time I sneeze the man in the cubicle next to me says "Bless you."
-The room started spinning and my eyes weren't focusing, my first thought was "NO! I don't have insurance!". Seriously.
-My dad sitting me down and asking me what happened, because I was so pretty in High School and now, well, I don't have a fashion sense, and I don't have anything to offer the world (looks wise), and he's worried if I move down to Utah and live with Katie Cullen I will never get married. The conversation ended with him saying "How about you do something you want to do, instead of something you think you should do." What kind of father says that? Africa here I come.
-I got a call from a man in the ward saying that someone had donated a car and they wanted to give it to me. Seriously! I am now the proud owner of a 2001 Kia Optima. God is still a God of miracles.

I'm still looking for a job in Utah, so if you have any suggestions PLEASE let me know! I can't believe Christmas is next week! How did that happen?!

Temporarily Yours

So, I've finally secured a job. It's temporary work because I don't want anything permanent in my life right now. I decided I'm going to write a book on my adventures. I've started a journal, so I will include some of the highlights and excerpts on my blog. What am I doing this Friday night? Well I made myself a instant pudding from a pouch and I decided to give into Katie Cullen's persistent texts and write about my experiences.

The highlight of this week came when I was connecting with my roots. I was walking the mean streets of Seattle's business district when I had a decision to make. Do I succumb to technology and Google map the bus stop I was trying to find, or ask a local? I decided to ask the most-likely homeless man pushing a bike up the hill for directions. He told and pointed and I offered to help him push his bike up the hill, he said "No thanks, it's good exercise". I continued on my way only to have him yell "It's 3 or 4 blocks that way" from half way up the street. The next man I saw was strumming a stick across the building next to where he was walking. He was also talking to himself and staring at me. I said hello in an English accent (I do that now because everyone in Hong Kong says hello in an English accent to me because I'm white, and I've realized if you have an accent, people are a lot nicer to you). He smiled and said "You're really pretty". I said thanks and kept walking.

My first assignment was a high class law firm. I was on the 72nd floor of the tallest building in Seattle. My employer told me that I needed to wear business professional clothing (IE no slacks, just skirts and dresses). My first day there, one of the accountants strolled in 2 hours late, wearing a flannel shirt and khaki pants. I thought to myself, are you serious?! I'm wearing pantyhose (because I haven't shaved my legs in 2 1/2 weeks) and she's pulling the lumberjack look? If the married-man-who-made-up-things-for-me-to-do-so-that-we-would-have-to-interact wasn't wearing a suit, I would have took it down a notch with my clothing. It was probably the most boring time in my life. The first day I answered the phone 7 times in 7 1/2 hours. I was paid to sit there and look pretty, but I failed miserably on the pretty part. I did however review 500 Chinese characters. Which brings me to the most embarrassing part of it all. The first day I brought my Chinese Book of Mormon and Cantonese grammar book to study at lunch. I also threw 200 character cards for the bus ride. When I got there, they had nothing for me to do and said I could do whatever I wanted. So, I read my books and studied my cards. I totally looked like one of those anime kids. You know, the ones that are obsessed with Japan. But except I'm 23 and I look like a normal person. I promise I have a personality and a life (ok, it's a stretch, but I'm NOT obsessed with China).

Other highlights of my experience include speaking Chinese on the phone when I was flustered, the creepy guy in the office that gets in your personal space without even being close to you turning out to be the top dog in the company (and who reminds me of Duane "Dog" Chapman because he's a hands on, in-your-face, but yet regal in his own weird way), I couldn't tell whether I saw a "co-worker" popping pills or eating something in a strange way, taking a picture with the flutist who plays in the subway, mastering Seattle's transit system which included 2 and 1/2 non-white people on the bus to Seattle this morning, and thinking my married co-worker was going to ask me out and losing all faith in the male race but then realizing he's just a really good guy and that my idea of men is completely tainted.

Life is so exciting. I sat today thinking, I HATE my job. I remember when I quit working at the bank I promised I would never work for corporate America again. When I came back from my mission I thought I wanted to work in corporate America. I realized today it's not for me. As I sat pondering, I thought about my favorite job and realized that I NEED to go back to Utah State Hospital. It was so much fun and despite the crappy hours it is where I need to be. Now I just need to purchase a car, and I'm there. Meaning that if I even get my 2009 tax return, I will be moving to Utah.

Star Wars or Lord of the Rings?

So This is a picture from traveling home. This lady is what Katie Cullen is going to look like in 15 years. She's fabulous. She has a HUGE rock on your hand, and looks so much like Katie I had to sneak a picture to show her. The lady next to me saw me take the picture and I just shrugged my shoulders and put the camera away. What the photo didn't capture is the Rock&Republic jeans so was wearing.



This picture captures my newest obsession. My nephew, Jonas Anakin Englund. Yes, he is named after a fictional Star Wars character. My family is so classy. I lurve him.



This picture is of me right before I went to my first job interview in FOUR years. Still unemployed, but who isn't these days right?! Those pictures on the wall behind me are the pictures that line the walls of my room, because I'm currently staying in my little brother's room. It's decked out with tons of beautiful black men everywhere. I lurve it too.

Does anyone watch Glee? Because Gwyneth Paltrow's character is me to a T.

So it's decided, I'm never getting married. I dragged my little sister Abby with me to the single's ward here. Double oo-er. The only "men" who will talk to us are 5'7" or weird and not in an intriguing way. It doesn't help that my sister says "Yeah, well, I just graduated from high school", which luckily has turned off anyone from wanting to date her (who would have thought right?!). But, that leaves me alone by myself. They know me as "China girl" and not because I'm petite and fabulous. I also had a conversation with a kid (literally looks like he's 18) who'd been back from his mission for 9 years (do the math). He talked to me about his passion for civil war reenactments and war artifacts/memorabilia. No joke. I did however forget to ask him my favorite question "Star Wars or Lord of the Rings?", which is typically the question I ask guys who have interest in me, because they are crazy or socially inept.