Yesterday was out of control. First of all, never, ever lie, because you might become a prisoner of your own house and get trapped in your kitchen as your roommates continue to spin a web of lies.
I'll leave out specifics in case the parties involved read this, but basically I'm being stalked by a man, and he hasn't gotten the hint that I'm not interested even though I have told him that I didn't want to go on another date with him (my mom made me go on a second date because she said "I know a lot of people who hated their spouse after the first date, give him another chance".) Thanks Mom, now I can't answer the door.
Anyways, so this kid stops by all the time to 'hang out' and I either pretend I'm sleeping or that I'm not home. He is the kind to knock repeatedly and stop by later. So yesterday I was making cookies and he stopped by. Katie Cullen told him that I was sleeping, but really I was in the kitchen. He then preceded to invite himself in and was watching TV with Jessie. I was now trapped in the kitchen and he was sitting on the couch that has a view of the walk way. After panicking, Katie Cullen came up with an ingenious plan that they would leave. So they did (meanwhile Yucca's excuse was "I'll come in another car, I have to...do my hair"). So then they left and he followed them to the parking garage, so they actually had to drive somewhere. When they came back he was in the parking lot next to our house. They had to run. Katie Cullen dropped the tortillas, it was a mess.
It was probably the most hilarious/most scary thing that has happened in a long time. I was trapped in my lies in my kitchen praying that he wouldn't walk in the kitchen and see me standing in the corner saying "Dear God, make me a bird. So I can fly, far, far away."
After that we decided to hula hoop and unicycle. That's right you heard me. Yesterday I unicycled. And no I'm not anymore coordinated they you remember. I was holding onto people while I peddled.
Then we went to the duck pond and saw two turtles in the water. I noticed right away that they were dead, but no one believed me. I kept repeating that they were dead, but everyone ignored me. Then Caroline Lamb picked up a turtle and it didn't move. It's head started flopping and we knew it was dead. Then Katie Cullen fished out the other dead turtle with a stick.
I went to my grandparents for dinner. The first question my grandpa asked me was "Are you getting married?" with so much promise in his voice. No Grandpa, I will never get married.
Basically it was a great day.
