So, when you are saying sorry for crashing my car, that you didn't have permission to drive, NEVER buy me a pie and think that counts as a sorry. Because it doesn't. It pisses me off more because I hate pie and it just shows that you don't care about my car or about what I actually like.
Why the anger? Let me go back to give you a full picture.
We went to Seattle for Christmas. We needed a ride to the airport. Nate's family lives in Orem, and since all my friends were out of town, we had someone in his family drive us (in our car) to the airport. It's a weird custom his family has, this drive someone else's car thing, but that's not even the issue.
Before we went to the airport, I had a bad feeling about the car. I told Nate about the bad feeling and how I wasn't comfortable with his family driving our car while we were gone. He doesn't believe in bad feelings. He reassured me multiple times that no one would drive the car. But after my persistance, he told me that we would take my car so that his family would know not to drive it. I said "Fine, but only your mom can drive it". The deal was set and 5 minutes before his mom was supposed to take us she said "I've been dizzy all day, so [Nate's sister] is going to take you". I gripped Nate's hand tightly and he said "What can we do?" and I said "Nothing". She drove us to the airport and I prayed and prayed she would make it home safely. She did.
Through out the next couple of days, I continued to have bad feelings. I nagged and nagged Nate to call and make sure no one was driving the car. He ignored it. On Christmas, when he called home, I made him ask if anyone was driving the car. His mom said "Nope, it's sitting outside, waiting for you to get back". I got the "I told you so look" and I finally trusted my husband.
The next day I had a very serious voicemail from my father-in-law asking me to call him back. I did, and was informed that my sister-in-law, had taken my car to go sledding because her car was in the shop. My father-in-law had recommended she take my car because she "was a good driver" (he repeated that about 6 times throughout the phone call). She had got in a fender bender, freaked out and called him. Minimal damage. Then when driving away from the fender bender, slid through a stop sign and wrecked my car, causing $1000 less than the total value of the car. She is willing to pay our deductible, Nate's dad said.
I flipped.
To add more salt to the wound. The day after we took my car to the shop, Nate's car wouldn't start. So we had to drive his parent's car until it was done. Well, because we couldn't wait a week for the part, they had to buy another one for double the price, all so that we could have a car. The total cost of his car was the exact amount of the budget we had set to go to Vegas for my birthday. "Small inconveniences".
The anger? It's not about a car. It's about trust. Trust in Nate's family and ultimately trust in Nate. I'm not a trusting person to begin with, and this just reaffirmed the fact I hate and don't trust people. I like to talk through things. I like to beat dead horses. But Nate's family doesn't. This has been swept under the rug, like it never happened. And, while everyone else is moving on with their lives, I come home from work and crawl into bed. I sleep the days I have off, and I have extremely high blood pressure.
I'm going crazy.
Then tonight, when Nate told me his sister wanted to talk about it, she came over gave me a pie, said "I'm sorry" and "I hope this makes everything ok?" and "I'm really late" (she was on her way to work), and left. I was prepared to talk about it and get it off my chest. Sweep, sweep, sweep.
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